Where Does That Highway Go?

Day 101

I couldn’t find a great place to park last night, so I sleepily pulled off the road in Apalachicola National Forest and hoped I was in an acceptable spot. I woke up undisturbed and thankful. I was determined to start pushing down the peninsula, so I drove back to Tallahassee and meandered through the central drag of Florida State University. There weren’t any great places to park, so I unfortunately have no pictures of the prettiest campus I’ve seen so far. The streets were bursting with plants and trees, and the buildings were colorfully and artfully painted. The only eyesores were the banners showing the school’s mascot, a shockingly stereotypical member of the Seminole tribe. I would guess the tribe today isn’t very happy about that.

I rounded the Gulf of Mexico, switching direction from east to south. The western edge of Florida is pleasant, but quite rural. The towns I passed through—Lamont, Perry, Cross City—didn’t have the heft that other Southern towns had. Occasionally I would stumble across a well-developed downtown, all festooned up for Christmas. This deeply disturbed me. Christmas decorations and tropical vegetation do not belong together. I began to understand why the people of Florida are so very strange.

It feels so very wrong. Perry, FL

Eventually I turned inland toward Ocala, where suburban sprawl began to pick up. I haven’t seen this much continued development since Colorado. I ate at a Mexican restaurant where every patron was glued to the Brazil-South Korea World Cup match. Brazil was scoring at will, and the announcer was reveling in thirty-second-long cries of “GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL”. This is the one facet in which soccer is superior to hockey. My food was pretty good, too.

I soldiered on until I reached the outskirts of Orlando. I will compliment Floridians on their tasteful holiday decorations. With rare exception, lights here are simple and clean. The weather tonight is equally beautiful; the temperature won’t dip below sixty degrees. I might even crack the windows. What a luxury! 

2 Comments

  1. Uncle Dave

    Christmas lights don’t belong with palm trees? Don’t tell anyone south of LA about that one! Had a friend when I was working at the radio station who was from Australia and going back home for the holidays. I asked him what he was going to do on his vacation, and he said: “Go to the beach! It’s what we always do for Christmas.” So it’s all a matter of your perspective.

    BTW, just to pop a popular bubble, if it weren’t for Andrew Jackson, the United States would never have acquired Florida until the Spanish-American War. They’d all be speaking Spanish down there. How ’bout that?!?

  2. Grandma

    Jeff and I spent a few days several years ago exploring the Gulf coast on the FL panhandle, looking for an appropriate place to rent where he could set up his telescope and camera and take pictures of the night sky. At that time the area was recovering from a major hurricane, and we found nothing to rent. It was west of Tallahassee. After spending all my Christmas’s in the northeast, it just seemed impossible to celebrate it in the south. I think they probably can buy Christmas trees, and for sure could set up a fake one. But it just could never be the same. Even street decorations, as you write, must seem out of place. But you did find tasteful decorations in the Orlando area, so that’s good. Jeff put out our few outdoor decorations last weekend, and they look nice. Sparse but nice! And I don’t even want any snow to enhance them. I hope you are enjoying being in FL. Sixty degrees sounds good to me. Have a safe trip up to NC. Looking forward to seeing you there. Love, Grandma

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